Bananas

It is said that a lot of people found their inspiration inside the bathroom. It works well on me, public restroom in my case. While taking a poo, I decided to write about it, complete with my experience.

Every few hours, a contraption consisting of 70% water, 20% carbon, 8% minerals, 1% poisonous thingies (artificial colouring, sweetener, formaldehyde, borax, Rhodamin B, etc) and 1% friendship, namely human body, dumps several hundred grams of chemicals called poop AKA banana AKA muffin.

These are bananas...

And this is a muffin.

The poo itself is not much a problem, despite the stink; the main problem comes when quantity increases while decreasing output's quality.

OOOOH SHIT!

No, mine was not that bad. It was still solid, solid enough to drop straight the hell hole... and the resulting splash breached the water closet's borders. I had to take a bath after - can't sacrifice my family's health. But it's still exhausting - sometimes it just went wrong and stuck inside, requiring extra power. Five times a day. Dare to beat my score?

Of course, I can take medications to stop the natural plumbing system. The only problem is that the medicine ceased it too perfectly the last time I used it. So perfect that I felt like a black hole - what comes in doesn't come out. Great outer space experience for three days, I should say.

Of course, my mother was curious.
"Kevin, when did the last time you had a poo?"
"Don't even remember. Maybe before you gave that chemical tablet thingies?"

My mother stopped the prescription.

Soon after the medicine subsided, the Black Hole collapsed into another hole called WC. The moment after, suddenly, the second Universe was created, along with Big Bang. Millions of bacteria entered this new world to do decomposing, eating, and conquering my septic tank's contents.

After all those (literal) shit, I went to the fridge and pulled out loads of healthy, juicy, fibrous tropical fruits from it, and ate them all. Hope that won't happen again.

Make up your mind and yell out something great, not something crap (like this story of course)

Ciao,
Manh Xa - Khaia

Explosive

Tired with your life? Wanna get famous now and die one hour later? Wanna get Blue Whale on Twitter? Then you've come to the right place! Just tweet some bad jokes from MANH & CO and be famous! Favourite quotations including: 

"Every BlackBerry user is Alay" by Rana Auliani; 

"What Goes Around Comes Around" by Justin Timberlake; and 

"The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" by... um... just forget it. 

Remember, with a LOW, LOW cost of being confronted by the whole nation. What are you waiting for? Be famous. Be cool.

That was the <sarcasm> best </sarcasm> ad ever. That will surely flame the whole Indonesia, at least areas which had been infected by Twitter, or Alays, or BlackBerry. Any of them. 


I wonder,if I ignited a match in a room full of BlackBerry users, would they burn?
We should be ashamed to ourselves - where is our self control? Where is our so - called hospitality? 

:@ :@ :@ :@ :@

We look like a pack of chirping (or tweeting, maybe) monsters now. What the world will say?


Make friends, not trending topics.


Ciao,
Manh Xa - Khaia

poetry |ˈpōətrē; ˈpōitrē|

noun

literary work in which special intensity is given to the expression of feelings and ideas by the use of distinctive style and rhythm; poems collectively or as a genre of literature : he is chiefly famous for his love poetry.

• a quality of beauty and intensity of emotion regarded as characteristic of poems : poetry and fire are nicely balanced in the music.

• something regarded as comparable to poetry in its beauty : the music department is housed in a building that is pure poetry.

ORIGIN late Middle English : from medieval Latin poetria, from Latinpoeta ‘poet.’ In early use the word sometimes referred to creative literature in general.

I have realized since long that my lazy brain likes dreaming, wondering... without any point at all. Without some intelligence to control it, the result would be catastrophic. As the result, I put all those things my brain tries to claim as its product, when it's only cliche things happened in my life.

Like this.

Bedebah

 Today at 04:12 | Edit Draft | Remove

Keringat bercucuran membasahi dahiku.

Mataku berlinang hantu yang hidup segan mati tak mau. Tercium daging yang membusuk, makin lama makin bau. Rangka yang tersisa, tulang - tulang yang tak lagi bersatu.

Ada orang berkata, segala yang buruk pasti akan tercium baunya. Deodoran sepuluh botol pun takkan mampu menyembunyikan aromanya. Kalau begitu, tinggal tunggu waktu saja sebelum orang menelanjangi kubur para pendosa.

Dan peluh menyiram cangkulku, cangkul yang menerabas batuan yang menghalangiku. Napasku makin memburu, makin nafsu. Kututup mataku, kulenyapkan ngeriku, kurangsang birahiku.

Aku mengangkat mayat itu, matanya memantulkan wajahku.

Nothing could be worse.