Showing posts with label Ramblings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ramblings. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

poetry |ˈpōətrē; ˈpōitrē|

noun
literary work in which special intensity is given to the expression of feelings and ideas by the use of distinctive style and rhythm; poems collectively or as a genre of literature : he is chiefly famous for his love poetry.
• a quality of beauty and intensity of emotion regarded as characteristic of poems : poetry and fire are nicely balanced in the music.
• something regarded as comparable to poetry in its beauty : the music department is housed in a building that is pure poetry.
ORIGIN late Middle English : from medieval Latin poetria, from Latinpoeta ‘poet.’ In early use the word sometimes referred to creative literature in general.
I have realized since long that my lazy brain likes dreaming, wondering... without any point at all. Without some intelligence to control it, the result would be catastrophic. As the result, I put all those things my brain tries to claim as its product, when it's only cliche things happened in my life.
Like this.


 Today at 04:12 | Edit Draft | Remove
Keringat bercucuran membasahi dahiku.


Mataku berlinang hantu yang hidup segan mati tak mau. Tercium daging yang membusuk, makin lama makin bau. Rangka yang tersisa, tulang - tulang yang tak lagi bersatu.


Ada orang berkata, segala yang buruk pasti akan tercium baunya. Deodoran sepuluh botol pun takkan mampu menyembunyikan aromanya. Kalau begitu, tinggal tunggu waktu saja sebelum orang menelanjangi kubur para pendosa.


Dan peluh menyiram cangkulku, cangkul yang menerabas batuan yang menghalangiku. Napasku makin memburu, makin nafsu. Kututup mataku, kulenyapkan ngeriku, kurangsang birahiku.


Aku mengangkat mayat itu, matanya memantulkan wajahku.


Nothing could be worse.

Monday, December 7, 2009

We Are Nightmares

No, you're not you. They are.


Don't you realize, you don't really exist? You are a dream, their dream, a dream to necome something stronger, something bigger, something better. They can live alone, but they have chosen not to be alone, for a greater good. They sacrificed everything they had, just to reach their dream.


But what they dreamt is a real crap; nothing strong, nothing great, yet it enslaved them, tortured them in its effort to become real, but it always fails, until they are tired living with it, and died with it.


You are the dream; you tortured them. 
Understand them, free them. 
Help them, raise them as your masters. 
You'll be free, 'cause they dream no more.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Quod Erat Demonstrandum

Some quotations won't make me the King of Quo(te). It's the way to quench my irrational side's thirst to burst.
Ok... here we go.


[logical core center reset]
[result unknown]
[8n*C*#*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
!!!!!!!

lame lame this is so lame! even lamer than llamas!!

at this time, I don’t have a place to talk about nonsense craps. like I used to do at EF :’S you know when you just say things like “I met that person again!” or “I wanna be a doctor!” or maybe the most unimportant thing like “OMG I MISSED CINTA FITRI AGAIN!!!!!” normal people might only answer “apaan sih” but this is so different. we talk about crap but we’re happy.

but now when I talk about unimportant stuffs, no one replies.
taken from Nilam
 
[AUTOMATIC SYSTEM RECOVERY]
[status : OK]




Damn, so far I've been trying to grasp the power of logic and self - control. So far so bad -_- but that doesn't mean it's impossible.
Perhaps it's because I'm doing what I want to do, not what I have to do. Although it feels good, but it's only for a while. Responsibility is a must, but so far I rejected it... why, why.

In order to maximize our strength, we have to admit that our tendency to seek happiness is our fatal flaw, our dangerous weakness. Having it means killing ourselves.

And I'm dying.

....?

Monday, November 16, 2009

It's Strong, Are You?

"There are obviously many things which we do not understand, and may never be able to."
(taken from Marathon)

The word above is a variation of a concept to justify our weakness as a human : Stultum (foolish).

For an uncertain period of its civilization span, humans have never truly reached the agreement about their point of life; why we are here, why we were put in the Earth rather than Tau Ceti, why we prefer dealing with our Macs rather than hunting for food and knowledge.

The last statement came from me. :D

Humans try to answer, but they never reached a point where their two ideas met.
It is the battle of Intuition and Logic. Not between man and women - women can get strong if only they are willing to let go their primitive nature of intuition (which is useless to say, since everyone believes it's their nature - but it isn't, it's patriarchal society - made.)

The Big Battle between The Faithful (religions, mystics, intuitives) and The Naturalist (scientists, sceptics, logics) has been started since people start knowing - I wonder why. However, I found something metaphorical to picture this - the famous Knowledge Tree, which fruit Adam ate.
For those who don't know about this, Humans begin their finite life when Adam ate the fruit which gave him Knowledge - that's why it's the Tree of Knowledge. We can conclude like this :

Know, and you're die.
Keep foolish, and you're safe.

But is it true?

Which of those two are better?

Anyway... I found some clues.

1st Answer : http://www.skepdic.com/ . It's a guide to critical thinking. To us it seems dangerous, and most will feel uneasy with this, since this site's views about supranatural things (and religions) are quite sceptical.

But we FEEL. We can't trust and rely on just our feelings, can we? All our senses can lie to us, but logic can never do the same - assuming you don't get confused with pseudoscience which seems logical.
Feelings are USELESS, for the WEAK.

And I've found that we can see God from a different perspective... and He looks even more powerful.

2nd Answer : my favourite game! (Marathon, in this case Marathon Infinity)



UESCTerm 802.11 (remote override)
0833 05.10.2337


rogue conditioned unit
origin: 
High Admiral Tfear (Command)
destin: 
rogue conditioned unit
ref: 
genocide
stamp: leniency


Very impressive. The primary function of intelligence is the subordination of our instinctive desires, the mark of a strong species. Which is why your kind will serve well the needs of the Hindmost Creche. The Hindmost is of an intelligence so vast, it encompasses the span of the Pfhor, and to those privilege to serve Her, appears insane. That is the final function of the Commanding Rank, the thought that we keep forever in our minds, that we deny our selfish, willful needs, so that the Empire will survive.

PgUp/PgDn/Arrows to Scroll
Return/Enter to Acknowledge







That's right - notice the highlighted text. :)

So which one is the true death? Knowing the truth... or knowing what we want to know?
I haven't found the answer yet.
It's all your choice, but whatever you choose, think carefully.
:)

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Of Hero And Military Attitudes

What? What happened today?

It's Heroes Day!

http://kopidangdut.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/bungtomo.jpg
Bung Tomo the Motivator

It was 64 earth years ago. The day was hot, and so are Indonesians. But they were hotter.

They were on fire.

Every Surabayan man (Arek Suroboyo) able to fight in the battlefield knew that this day would change theri life forever. That day, the Alliance were planning to invade their city, and later, their country. Rifles loaded, eyes opened.

Days before, the Alliance spreaded terror : fight, and you die; surrender, and you're safe - but every single man here knew that the former would lead them to the latter anyway. So why surrender?

The Alliance gained control over Surabaya, but with a high price of blood in every step they took.

Later, this invasion ignited resistance in Jakarta, Bandung, Bogor, etc. Oh, Indonesians' struggle (not only this battle, but the whole war) lasted for about four years, until finally, Netherlands admitted their existence in Round Table Conference, Den Haag.

***********************************************************************************

Thursday, October 29, 2009

The Cycle

So here I am, at the tip of my fall, pushed by my own pride. I have been moving around for fifteen and almost half moments and will be doing it certainly for an uncertain moments, defined with n or ∞, means undefinable.

Here, at the top of my bottom - located heart, once again I will be very far away from them, from me, I'm afraid. This cycle is unstoppable, spinning with furious turns, pretty like a ballerina, and rampant like a tornado.

Here and now, here and now, I have to cope with it.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Separation. Rise Alien Rise

This day... another reality - facing day. I can hear them, I can hear them.
Can you feel the slap? Arrive, welcomed, and trashed as you started act your way?

I'm not in the mood for a fairytale. Or kecak dance performance perhaps. Yeah, I was free.
Was.
But there's something important happened today.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The Wake

5478 days since my first second in the earth, and hundreds of moments i've been thinking, and now I realised my existence as a selfish alien being.

Surprised?

Ten minutes ago since i started writing this, I was waiting for the lift when a teacher I didn't recognise greeted me. She asked me if I was too active (read : tired), because I was too quiet, she said. She told me to concentrate more and take some rest.

That's not the problem, though. But the point is, she REMEMBER me.

And I don't.

I never have much time for the others. I rarely think of the others - sure, I thinked too much of them during daydreaming, and rarely do the same while taking practical decisions.

Do you feel the same?

Friday, October 16, 2009

A Piece Of Reality Cake

+++SOL+++
!@#$%^&*()_+
d| ^_^ |b
d| ^.^ |b
d| ^ ^ |b
d| ^@^ |b  

\|/
/\
/   \
/ -_- \

Oh, don't mind those sh*ts - I'm rambling.
Stop.

I am sorry for my autistic world - derived ramblings, and is ready for some REAL stuff - instead of endless waves of dreams and hopes.